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Celebrating Moms

Does anyone else have mixed feelings about Mother’s Day? Maybe our mom wasn’t so great and Mother’s Day is a painful reminder of what we never had. Or maybe our mother has passed and we just miss her. Maybe we long to become a mom but it just hasn’t happened. 

I know it’s supposed to be a special day with family but when my kids were young, I just wanted a day off! It took me a few years as a mother to realize that I need to communicate in the week leading up to Mother’s Day what I would like to see happen.  Moms, set the expectations for your day! No one can read your mind or guess what feels honoring to you. Let your family know ahead of time what makes you feel uniquely loved, appreciated, and honored.

When Mother’s Day is no big deal, everyone loses: our children don’t learn how to demonstrate honor and respect toward women, a watching community fails to perceive the value of motherhood. And let’s face it, us moms are giving it all we’ve got 24/7 and a genuine expression of love would be like oxygen to our soul!  We live in a culture where women haven’t always been honored. To swim upstream from that current creates a space where mothers are celebrated and treated with respect.

I like to think of the week leading up to Mother’s Day as a great time to hit all the love languages as we honor the mommas around us. I reach out to the women who have played the important role of mentor in my life. I recognize the great moms in my community. Women can encourage each other this week– with words of affirmation in what we say or write. We can create quality time together or send a gift that shows our thoughtfulness. We can find ways to serve each other, honor each other, and show affection. We all long to know that we are doing a beautiful job as a mom and that perhaps others see it and are inspired.

Whenever I begin to doubt my impact as a mother or question the worth my role, I reflect on the honor that Jesus displayed toward His mother. In His final act of honor, love, and compassion Jesus spoke to His mother from the cross. He charged His number one disciple, John, to care for His mother. And then He released His Spirit to God. Think about it–in a cultural context where women were not honored or esteemed, Jesus cared for His mother in a practical and profound way.

Do you have a spiritual mom in your life? A woman who took the time to mentor and disciple you? Honor her this week! If you are blessed to have your mom in your life or to be that mother to little ones, take time this week to celebrate this privilege. And to all the mommas out there, God bless you this week and thank you for all that you do to make this world a beautiful place! 

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God’s Promises

“I will pour out My Spirit on your offspring, and My blessing on your descendants.” (Isaiah 44:3)

My daughter recently started leading worship at church. As you can probably guess, my momma heart is thrilled to see her experiencing God in such powerful ways. My little girl has grown up to be an inspiring, godly young woman. She listens to God and translates faith to her peers. Her life is blessed and I’m constantly reminded of God’s promises to honor those who honor Him. 

I remember driving with our four kids in the minivan, racing from school to activities, changing clothes in the car and inhaling a quick snack. We’d speed from soccer for one child to gymnastics for three; next, piano lessons with Grandma and then home to make dinner and do homework. The thought was always close by though, none of this will matter if they don’t know Jesus! Our children can be talented in sports, music, theater, whatever—but if they have not been nurtured in their friendship with Christ then we missed the mark! We could be busy doing urgent things but not the most important.   O Lord, please keep our lives centered in You!  

Faithful Mommas out there, take these scriptures as God’s promises to you:

“I will pour out My Spirit on your offspring, and My blessing on your descendants. This one will say, ‘I am the Lord’s; And another will write on his hand, ‘Belonging to the Lord’” (Isaiah 44:3,5)

“Your children will be like olive plants around your table. Behold, for thus shall the one be blessed who fears the Lord.” (Psalm 128:3-4)

“Let our sons in their youth be as grown-up plants, and our daughters as corner pillars fashioned for a palace. How blessed are the people whose God is the Lord!” (Psalm 144:12,15)

If like me, you were not brought up as a Christian, there’s great interest in growing as a godly parent. I’ve looked at our home priorities and asked, do we have a heart for worship? Do we love and serve people? Do we know our worth and identity, not according to the world, but according to God?  Mentoring a generation to walk with God in our complex world doesn’t happen accidently. It is a beautiful, intentional process that I describe in my book, Gracious Living, creating a culture of honor, love, and compassion. “Gracious parenting is a seed watered by emotional maturity—one that bears fruit for generations.” (Gracious Living, p 84)

Yes, the seeds I planted in my kids twenty years ago are bearing fruit today. Prayers I prayed, deposits I made in their hearts—and withdrawals as well, are bearing fruit today. God promises blessing and fruitfulness to those who walk with Him. If you are in the throes of raising little ones, be encouraged that God is faithful about His promises. Christian parenting is not about doing it perfectly; but rather loving our children as we follow and obey God’s voice.

God promised that He would pour out His Spirit on our offspring. Bless your kids today as you partner with Him, dreaming beautiful dreams and sowing seeds for their destiny. Get my book, Gracious Living as encouragement for your journey and please subscribe to my blog at http://www.MargaretAllen.org Encourage the moms you know by sharing this post!

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Shifting the Atmosphere

Wisdom writings in the Bible said: “To everything there is a season, a time for every purpose under heaven: A time to gain, and a time to lose; a time to keep and a time to throw away.” (Ecclesiastes 3) I’ve been reflecting on what brings joy in life and what doesn’t. It’s easy to get stuck in patterns that aren’t helpful or healthy. Us moms often have a finger on the pulse of our homes: are people tired, frustrated, bored? Are we in a slump of watching TV every night or retreating to our own rooms? Maybe we are already anticipating what Thanksgiving will be like with family this year. Now is the time to evaluate how we are doing and make mid-course adjustments. We can introduce change in thoughtful and fun ways. Does our family need nurturing or change right now? Here are five easy and inexpensive hacks to shift our home atmosphere this week:

  1.  Get outside. Even if it’s just going for a walk in your neighborhood or playing games in the front yard, it feels good to get outside and move around. If you have more time available, hike the nearby mountains, enjoy the sunset, or play at a park or beach. We all need a change of scenery. Simply discover the space that speaks to you. Ahh, fresh air!
  2. Serve somebody. Our lives are meant for higher purpose and nothing feels better than to serve others. Bake cookies for a neighbor, volunteer at a family shelter, babysit for a single mom. We all are seeking connection in this difficult time. Volunteer opportunities abound and, as much as you can make service decisions a group effort, you will witness your family’s heart light up with meaning.
  3. Set boundaries on your time. Now that we are working from home and living at work, we need structure. Note your work schedule, technology use, time sitting vs. active and so on. Design a weekly schedule that creates the life you long for. Does your time allow for relationships, creativity, exercise, great food, music, and gratitude? Setting mindful boundaries gives us space to savor the good things in life! 
  4. Create a Spiritual Climate. How can we withstand the negativity in our culture right now if our families have no shared spiritual experiences? Let your kids hear you pray, worship, read scripture. Discuss what God is doing in your lives. Read a few scriptures together after dinner each night. It is never too late or too early to establish a godly culture within your home.
  5. Learn together. If this entire year is just one big time-out, we might as well learn something! Kids love learning alongside their parents. Watch YouTube videos to master juggling, or how to paint a landscape like Bob Ross, cook Thai cuisine, design 2020 T-shirts for your family, and so on.  We all have something we wish we could improve if we only had the time. 

To everything there is a season. What’s working for you? Go to www.MargaretAllen.org for declarations to speak over your life and to get the book, Gracious Living, creating a culture of honor, love, and compassion.